The Table Turns

Ok, I know I’ve been on slack-mode with writing entries, but the truth is……..I’ve been S-W-A-M-P-E-D at the office. I'm writing several major reports on my program, plus still de-briefing from travel back in April, and trying to plan program activities for the next fiscal year. You know the new Obama Administration got us in “prove your program” mode. But I welcome it and certainly understand. Really I do.

Today, I finally relieved myself of this huge headache that has been making me feel like I’m having anxiety and stress attacks. Yes, yes…..I beat the due date by 9 days!!! All kinda numbers are running through my head and if I have to add another page to the already 67 page report I think I’ma scream. Seriously, I am. My head hurts, I haven’t had a decent meal in days (thank God for the family cookout tomorrow—lol), and I want to go to the gym for normal reasons not just to relieve the day’s tension. My muscles feel locked. No, I ain’t claiming NOTHING, but my body has been feeling the pangs of my intense labor--lol.

Ok, something interesting happened this week and I was reminded today of a lifelong lesson. See, I manage a program that has a total of 10 grantees and 42 subgrantees. One of my grantees, only one, has been violating program regulations for the last few months and so last week I got a little sick and tired of folk taking my fairness as a weakness. If I may say so, I have EXTRAORDINARY work ethics. I’m no-nonsense, but fair. I try to meet each at their individual needs. But this one tried to take me for granted. I don’t care if you have a Masters in Social Work. It is my job to enforce federal rules and regulations. So I wrote a very nice-ty email to my grantee basically saying……. “because you have been non-compliant, I must therefore……[yada, yada]” All of a sudden my phone and email was on overdrive. Here I was trying to write a time-sensitive report to our parent agency, and then all of a sudden have to put out an unnecessary fire. So I haven't been in the best mood this week. Ironically, I feel sooo far out of the Lord's presence its not funny. And I hate feeling this way.

Anyway........long story short, my grantee saw that I was quite serious, so she apologized profusely saying that she was so sorry and didn’t mean to jeopardize her grant……yada, yada. So I listened. And at first I was thinking that I was gonna make this chick sweat. Cause I like when folk beg---lolol. Just being honest. But then after the third phone call and second email I gave in. I spoke with her for a good 2½ hours going over the program and how I can help her get out of the mess she put herself in. I ain’t lying……the first hour was me trying to console her tears cause she didn’t realize what she had done. She kept saying……… “Jill, how could I be so stupid?” I just listened. I could’ve very well pulled the plug. But then I really felt bad because I thought about all the participants in her program who would be affected. And other than her trying to play “Ms. Big Shot” and doing things on her own agenda, she is sharp and knows her stuff. So I gave her a second chance. Cause in the grand scheme of things I could be put in that same situation. It’s not hard to be. So when she heard my final comments she thanked me for understanding and for accepting her apology. She promised that this would never ever happen again with her organization.

Then something happened.

That conversation with my grantee was on Tuesday. Today, my agency received a startling announcement via email that my grantee, yes the one I had the conversation with on Tuesday, was hired to be our new boss. When I read it and saw the name I gasped and ran through the office screaming to my colleagues. They were running towards me at the same time. I couldn’t believe it. Still shocked. I don’t know how it happened, if it was known before or during I had the conversation, or what. It just doesn’t make sense. I knew the position was open, but the successor was still a mystery.

God is soooo good. I was reminded of a valuable life lesson today………..always be good to people because you’ll never know what role they will play in your life. I think about how some of my colleagues look down on the cleaning crew, and the mailroom guys. I've never been raised that way. I can hold a conversation with the security guard as well as director. I try my best to treat people the same. Not just cause I'm not sure who I'll pass on the way up, but because I treat folk how I want to be treated. With the utmost respect. Bottomline.

Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. --Matthew 7:12